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Distelmans, who wears leather coats and boots and artfully tossed scarves, has become a celebrity in Belgium for promoting a dignified death as a human right, a “tremendous liberation,” and he gives talks at cultural centers, hospitals, and schools around the country.In September, 2011, Godelieva saw Distelmans at his clinic.Two years later, their father, Hendrik Mortier, a radiologist, committed suicide. In a diary entry from 1990, when her children were teen-agers, she instructed herself to “let my children be themselves, respect them in their individuality.” But she found herself fighting with her daughter, who was independent and emotionally distant, and depending on her son, Tom, a “victim of my instability,” she wrote.She worried, she told her psychologist, that her children were “now paying for all that has happened generations earlier.”The happiest time in Godelieva’s life began when she was in her early fifties and had a new boyfriend.Distelmans was one of the leading proponents of a 2002 law in Belgium that permits euthanasia for patients who have an incurable illness that causes them unbearable physical or mental suffering.Since then, he has euthanized more than a hundred patients.In the summer of 2011, when she was sixty-three, Godelieva met a new doctor.
“Do not want to always nod yes like her and be self-effacing.”Godelieva was preoccupied with the idea that she would replicate her parents’ mistakes with her own children.
Then, in 2010, her boyfriend broke up with her, and she felt black again.
She stopped wearing makeup and doing her hair, and she cancelled dates with friends, she said, because she felt ugly and old.
She felt that she had lost her , a Dutch word that refers to the sense that there is something to live for.
Tom was only thirty minutes away, but she no longer had the energy to drive to his house.